In which I've finally decided what I want to be when I grow up

When I grow up,
I want to be
full not of myself
but of grace.

I want to be
first
to believe the best,
to forgive,
to hope against history,
to trust against odds,
to be brave enough to be broken,
wounded, even in the over and over way.

When I grow up,
I want to be
the friend you call when you are a mess,
the one who knows how to cry along in the dark places,
the one who knows the language of light and when to speak it.

When I grow up,
I want to be
patient,
fearless,
kind,
tender-hearted,
slow to anger,
quick to laugh.

When I grow up,
I want to be
the girl who glimpses heaven in an ocean shore,
the daughter who finds the gospel forever amazing,
the mother who lives in the moment, for eternity's sake.

Today I am 7 + 30.
And I know
exactly
what I want to be
when I grow up.