The Rebranding of the Lunch Lady

Me: Caed, do you need me to peel the orange in your lunch or can you get it started by yourself?

C: No, I can do it. And don't worry, if I need help, I can raise my hand and one of the guards can help me with it.

Me: Guards? Do you mean the cafeteria helpers?

C: Well, I've never heard them called THAT before. I call them guards.

Me: Why do you call them guards?

C: I don't know. I guess because they guard the pizza and the desserts and stuff. It's just what they're called, Mom. Trust me.

Lunch ladies, prison guards, same diff, right?

Now hurry, kiddo, or you'll be late for prison school!